Tori Spelling to Pen Third, Useless Memoir

January 7, 2010

 Tori Spelling to Pen Third, Useless Memoir

 Tori Spelling to Pen Third, Useless Memoir

It’s one of the most embarrassing facts we’ve ever come across:

Each of Tori Spelling’s first two memoirs ranked on New York Times-bestsellier’s list, with Mommywood and sTORItelling combining to sell over 800,000 copies.

While our staff racks our brain to come up with a single reason why anyone would care about this washed-up actress’ take on family life, we’re sad to report that she isn’t done. A third book, tentatively titled unchartered terriTORI, is scheduled to hit stores in June.

“I love sharing my stories and experiences with people and connecting to them on both a humorous and emotional level,” Spelling told People. “”Whenever something happens that makes me laugh or if I remember something in the middle of the night that I want to share, I jot the experience down.”

tori 379x521 Tori Spelling to Pen Third, Useless Memoir

Expect the nauseating tome to cover tabloid scrutiny of Spelling’s weight; her contentions relationship with mother Candy; and life with husband Dean McDermott.

Other rumored titles for the book include:

  • TORIble: My Guest-Starring Stint on 90210
  • Self-ExplanaTORI: Stuff I should have said in my previous two memoirs
  • DefamaTORI: A shameless attempt to cash in
  • An ObligaTORI Attempt to Remain Relevant
  • Downward TrajecTORI: My Career in a Nutshell

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