Miley Cyrus: A Colossal Disappointment

June 8, 2010


Over the past couple weeks, THG has been harsher than usual when it comes to Miley Cyrus. We’ve referred to her scantily-clad European performances as pathetic and desperate.

To their credit, Miley fans have stuck up for their gal. They’ve argued that she isn’t acting any differently than past artists who have wanted to reach an older audience by shedding their clothing or grinding with girls.

So, why has THG singled out Cyrus in such a manner? Simply put: because she’s wasted an opportunity to be a different kind of role model to young women around the world.

The second we met Britney Spears as a professional singer, she was wearing a Catholic schoolgirl’s outfit and singing about sex. She made it clear from day one that she was a provocative artist, one whose lack of true singing ability meant she’d be relying on raunchy acts to remain relevant.

It’s similar for Lady GaGa. She’s openly admitted that she was a floundering artist until she came up with a unique name and look.

Miley Performance

But Miley is different. Thanks to Hannah Montana, she already has an established fan base of millions. Unlike Britney and GaGa, there’s no need for Cyrus to shock and scintillate in order to make headlines and sell albums.

That’s what makes this transformation so disappointing. This is a Nashville resident that says she hates pop music. She had an opportunity to sing the kind of songs she actually likes, taking her extremely loyal followers along for the ride. They’ll follow her anywhere, so why not take them down an original, creative path, as opposed to this lame, redundant schtick?

In Billboard, Miley says she’s “grown up a lot,” but wouldn’t that have been the grown-up thing to do? To have branched out and actually been her own woman, tackling the kind of singles she claims to believe in?

Instead, Miley Cyrus has become just another generic, booty-shaking, scantily-clad, same-sex kissing act.

Miley’s fans defend her by saying to “leave her alone” because she’s “only 17.” But do these people even listen to the artist herself?

Cyrus has gone to great lengths to talk about her maturity and how profound her music is. She even refers to it as art.

Putting aside how incredibly pompous she often sounds when she makes these statements, Miley clearly has a message when giving interviews and (especially) when wearing certain outfits: I’m not only 17!

It’s obvious that Miley would be more offended than anyone when compared to an average teenager. She sees herself as A LOT more than that.

Limo Riding

In the interest of full disclosure, I have a little sister and I was hoping to see Miley as a lot more than that, too. My sister grew up worshiping Hannah Montana. Her room is still adorned with Miley posters.

So, what exactly am I supposed to tell her when she asks why Cyrus “got to first base” with another dancer last week? Should I sit my sister down and explain it was all just a marketing ploy, and, see, Miley didn’t actually kiss the girl because that technicality gave her the chance to jump online and thumb her nose at those that dared to accuse her of such an act?

It’s depressing that I need to even consider this question. When making her career transformation, Miley had a choice: Be like Taylor Swift or be like Britney. She chose the latter and that’s where my disappointment stems from.

I have a feeling many Miley defenders may even join me in the near future. After all, look where Britney is now. If that’s Miley in a few years, I’ll try my hardest not to say “I told you so.”

Lady Gaga “Alejandro” Music Video: Released!


After a brief tease the other day, Lady Gaga has released the full video for her newest hit, “Alejandro,” and it’s as epic and brazenly self-indulgent as you think.

At this point, did you expect anything less from Lady Gaga?

Filmed by acclaimed photographer Steven Klein, Gaga calls the nine-minute video pure “celebration of [her] love and appreciation for the gay community.”

That might explain the shirtless men with bowl cuts dancing in high heels, plus Gaga stripping for them in a giant orgy, plus the obligatory Catholic imagery.

It’s as if she wants it to be controversial or something.

She’s set the bar high (musically, and with Lady Gaga hermaphrodite rumors), so she’s got a lot to live up to. Does “Alejeandro” do it? Watch and vote …

What do you think of Lady Gaga’s “Alejandro” video?

Heidi makes the split legal

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Even if it’s just a publicity stunt, no one can say Heidi Montag isn’t committed: the Hills star filed for legal separation from Spencer Pratt on June 8 in Santa Monica, Calif. It’s not a divorce, but it does mean that their finances will be separate. After leaving the home she shared with Spencer recently, Heidi moved into a new home in Malibu with her pal, Jen Bunney, with whom she is filming a new reality show. As In Touch has previously reported, insiders insist the split is “fake and for the press” and just “another opportunity for Spencer to make money.” But a friend says that thanks to Spencer’s crazy behavior lately, Heidi’s heart isn’t in it anymore. “Heidi checked out of the relationship months ago,” the friend told In Touch.

Gary Coleman’s Family, Friends and Agent to Shannon Price: You Suck!


As we discussed earlier, Shannon Price may be the worst person ever.

First, Gary Coleman’s ex-wife said during the 911 call she made that she wouldn’t drive him to the hospital herself because she didn’t want to be traumatized.

We gave her the benefit of the doubt there … foolishly. Soon enough, she’s selling Gary Coleman death photos and hawking interviews to the highest bidder.

It’s no surprise that people close to Coleman are as appalled as we.

Victor Perillo, Gary’s former agent, is sick after hearing reports that his ex-wife Shannon Price took and sold photos of the former child star on his death bed.

Gary Coleman, Shannon Price in Court

Gary took Shannon to Divorce Court. It’s easy to see why.

The photos, showing Coleman in the hospital with tubes attached to him, “were never meant to get out,” insists Price’s family … even though she sold them.

Perillo said: “While Gary Coleman’s family continues to privately grieve the passing of their son, they would like to thank all of his fans for their generous support.”

“This kind gentle soul left the world with many beautiful memories to cherish.”

“That is why I am personally appalled to hear the news that some individuals are selling photos of Gary in the hospital. This is unconscionable and despicable. I would like to praise all the reputable news organizations that declined the offers.”

“I hope others will do the same out of respect and human decency.”

Coleman’s Diff’rent Strokes costar Todd Bridges even Twittered: “To find out pics of Gary Coleman in his last days got out, I hope someone burns in hell.”

Hard to argue with Todd there.

Heidi Montag Files For Legal Separation From Spencer Pratt; Hoax Getting More Elaborate?


The plot thickens again. Heidi Montag showed up at the Santa Monica Courthouse this morning and officially filed for legal separation from Spencer Pratt. 

Well, if the breakup is a hoax, as many suspect they’re sure going all in on it, we give them credit. Montag cited irreconcilable differences as the reason.

Heidi did not file divorce papers, however. The legal significance of legal separation is that her earnings will become her separate property from that date.

She lists the date of separation as today, June 8.

Heidi Montag in Court

Bodyguards and media flank Heidi as she leaves a Santa Monica courthouse with legal papers. Is she really leaving Spencer? [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnlline.com]

Interestingly, under the section, “community assets and debts,” Heidi Montag wrote, “No such assets or debts.” This implies that Heidi and Spencer Pratt have some kind of prenuptial agreement in place which keeps their assets separate.

Or they’re just broke … nothing would shock us, honestly.

In typical Speidi fashion, even the filing was a $h!tshow. Heidi tried filing the papers in Malibu, only to learn that the Malibu courts don’t handle divorces.

Any lawyer would have told Heidi that, but filed the documents in her own handwriting, without any evidence of a lawyer involved, which is highly unusual.

A Heidi source says while she’s not ready to file for divorce, Speidi’s split is legit: “Heidi would never take legal action unless it was … It is not a stunt.”

Whatever that’s worth. Your thoughts?

Lindsay Lohan’s Alcohol Monitor Goes Off, World Gasps in Collective Astonishment


Has Lindsay Lohan lost her battle with the dreaded SCRAM device?

Her court-ordered alcohol-monitoring bracelet/anklet was trigged Sunday evening during an MTV Music Awards after party, according to a People source.

Dun-dun-DUNNNN! It remains unclear if alcohol was detected in her system or Lohan’s ankle bracelet was tampered with – either would alert authorities.

Man. The actress may face jail time if the judge in her case rules that the star violated the conditions of her bail, abstaining from alcohol among them.

The ankle monitor must be kept on in accordance with her probation as well, and she must submit to random drug testing (she passed both so far).

Hiding the Monitor

Will Lindsay end up in jail? [Photo: Splash News Online]

Judge Marsha Revel is expected to receive a report on why the SCRAM went off soon, the source says, and could order Lohan’s bail revoked immediately.

Lindsay is out on bail after missing her last probation hearing, which stems from her past DUI arrest. Got all that? Her rescheduled hearing is July 6.

Let’s be fair: It’s possible the device triggered a false positive somehow, and she’s trying to go clean. SCRAMs have been known to, it’s not uncommon.

But come on, is anyone buying that? She went to an after-party after one of the biggest partying events of season. And come on, it’s Lindsay Lohan.

It may be moot now, but who will prevail?

Christina Aguilera Performs on Today, Hypes New Album


The first part of Christina Aguilera’s plans to promote her new album (on sale today!) didn’t exactly go as planned:

She’s canceled her North American tour.

But that doesn’t mean she won’t have a chance to perform for fans at all, as evidenced by this morning’s Today Show concert.

As part of the Toyota concert series, Xtina appeared at Rockefeller Center and sung “Fighter,” “Bionic,” “Not Myself Tonight” and “Beautiful.” Watch her in action below, first in still images and then via video…

At Rockefeller Center

Down and DirrrrtyChristina in the Big AppleHairy PerformanceXtina PerformingOn Today Show

Will you purchase Aguilera’s new CD? Ponder that question and check out her rendition of “Not Myself Tonight” right now:

Holloway murder suspect confesses!


Joran van der Sloot, the prime suspect in Natalee Holloway’s disappearance and presumed murder in Aruba in 2005, has reportedly confessed to killing a woman in Peru. “The girl intruded into my private life,” the 22-year-old Dutchman reportedly said in his tearful admission to authorities regarding the death of Stephany Flores, the 21-year-old business student who was found dead of an apparent broken neck in his hotel room on May 30.

Van der Sloot — who is seen on a video entering the room with Flores, later making a brief trip to pick up coffee, then leaving alone — reportedly told authorities that he snapped when Flores looked at photos from the Holloway case on his computer while he was out running the errand. He was arrested after crossing the Peruvian border into Chile. Van der Sloot was scheduled to take police on a “reconstruction” of events from the night of Flores’ death today and he is now expected to be formally charged with the crime. The Peruvian justice system has no death penalty or life sentence and judges often issue lighter sentences when suspects confess, but van der Sloot could still get up to 35 years in prison. He was never officially charged in Holloway’s death because of lack of evidence. The news of his confession came on the same day that the Natalee Holloway Resource Center, which will provide assistance to families of missing people and safe traveling advice for students, opened in Washington, D.C.

How Rebecca lost the baby weight!

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Rebecca Gayheart gave birth to daughter Billie Beatrice just three months ago, but she’s already looking svelte in an asymmetrical Catherine Malandrino dress at the 9th Annual Chrysalis Butterfly Ball on June 5 in LA. “I think it was the breast feeding to be perfectly honest. And I’m eating pretty healthy, whole foods,” she told In Touch at the event, which benefits the local homeless community. And while her husband, Eric Dane, may be known as Grey’s Anatomy‘s McSteamy, Rebecca Gayheart says their newborn daughter is actually quite dreamy! “She’s cooing, she’s smiling, she’s cackling out loud,” gushed the actress. “She’s just so dreamy!”

Jon Gosselin: Stoned Out of His Mind


This isn’t breaking news at all, but it is hilarious: A video of Jon Gosselin stoned last summer with then-girlfriend Hailey Glassman has just leaked online.

If you recall, the two just started dating and were vacationing in St. Tropez, France, with Ed Hardy designer Christian Audigier. Looks like they had fun.

An insider tells Radar Online, the king of exclusive non-stories, that they smoked spliffs (marijuana and tobacco mixed) and were drunk on champagne.

Jon Gosselin, who was still married to Kate then, took turns with Hailey Glassman filming each other, making cracks about the French and lactose issues.

Hailey Glassman Photo

The trip marked Jon and Hailey’s first public appearance together.

When Glassman references her curly hair during a salon mishap she experienced in St. Tropez, Jon interrupts with: “It looked like big Jewish pubes.” Class.

At one point, Jon, with a cigarette up his nose, says: “This is how the French smoke. They smoke so much they put cigarettes in every orifice of their body.”

While there is no paraphernalia or anything, and it certainly matters little if they were actually stoned, their behavior would certainly suggest that it’s true.

You can see the rest for yourself after the jump:

Jon Gosselin Stoned