Chinese Woman Plans to Win Back Boyfriend, Resemble Jessica Alba

January 27, 2010


Suddenly, Tila Tequila doesn’t seem so crazy…

A Chinese woman that wants to win back her ex-boyfriend is making plans to resemble his ideal woman, Jessica Alba.

According to Fox News, a 21-year-old named Xiaoqing, told The Shanghai Daily that she has met with doctors at a plastic surgery clinic and has “made my decision” to undergo a variety of procedures. The goal of them? To emulate Alba in every physical way possible.

“I’m not only doing it for my ex-boyfriend, but for myself,” she said. “I am a psychologically weak person. I want to do something to challenge myself and build a strong personality through it.”

J. Alba

The woman will reportedly need eyebrow lifting, eyelid reshaping and nose reconstruction to look like the beauty pictured above.

Xiaoqing told the newspaper that her former flame decorates the walls of his bedroom with Jessica Alba pictures and demanded she do her make-up like the actress, even when she slept. He also gave her a wig for Christmas and demanded it she wore it at all times.

“I love him very much…. that’s why I always followed his opinions. I don’t want to lose him,” Xiaoqing said.

Why would you? The guy sounds like a winner.

Hayden’s red-hot romance!

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For Hayden Panettiere, a new year means a new mane — and a new man! The formerly blond beauty looked red-hot as she debuted her coppery ‘ do at the Temple Grandin premiere in New York on January 26. “It’s fun to change things up. I feel like I don’t have to overcompensate as much personality-wise with red hair as I did with blond hair. I’m typically a very fiery person anyway!” the Heroes starlet told In Touch at the HBO film’s event. Speaking of fiery, the actress recently enjoyed a sexy beach getaway in Miami with her new beau, Ukrainian boxer Wladimir Klitschko. Will Hayden and her man heat up with a Valentine’s Day rendezvous? “He has a fight coming up in March, so he’s going to be in hard core training,” she
said. “But girlfriends are always great on Valentine’s Day! They’re always the best!”

Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston: Back Together (Tabloids Unanimously Declare)!


Rumors of Angelina Jolie cheating on Brad Pitt and their relationship being on the rocks got so bad that the couple actually hit back at the tabloids this week.

Well, the tabloids just collectively retaliated tenfold!

According to OK! Weekly, a publication with reporting so terrible that even Kourtney Kardashian kalls them out, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston are back on!

Leave it to George Clooney to play matchmaker, their story hilariously says. He allegedly arranged for the former spouses to to bump into each other Friday.

And they did just that at the Hope For Haiti Now Telethon, reuniting at an elaborate backstage buffet while Brad’s partner, Angelina Jolie, was away in NYC!

The drama! Angie had already been in a jealous rage over Jen and Brad. Just imagine when she stops in to pick up some groceries later and learns that …

Jen and Brad Back On!

TOGETHER AGAIN: That 15-second Haiti telethon run-in was something! Nice line through the pics, guys. Too bad they didn’t pose together for this made-up story.

The magazine’s in-depth reporting goes on to describe Brad and Jen’s “emotional reunion” and state that the actress is ready for a future with her ex-husband.

But why trust OK! alone? Three other celebrity gossip weeklies got in on the same action this week, declaring a messy end to the couple known as Brangelina:

BradJen Split I

BRAD’S MISERY: Jennifer Aniston broke up Brangelina, according to myriad fake sources. In other news, Spencer Pratt created a monster named “Franken-Heidi.”

Adrian Pasdar Arrested for DUI


Looks like Adrian Pasdar couldn’t flee the Heroes set quickly enough!

The actor that played Nathan Petrelli on that critically-lambasted series was arrested early this morning for “failing to maintain his lane,” according to police, on the 405 in Los Angeles. He was clocked driving his Ford F-150 truck at 94 mph.

Adrian Pasdar

Reports indicate that cops pulled Pasar over around 3 a.m. and smelled alcohol on his breath. He refused to take a breathalyzer and was eventually placed under arrest for suspicion of DUI.

The actor – who is married to Dixie Chicks singer Natalie Maines – was taken to a nearby jail. His bail was set at $15,000, but, hey, it could be worse:

He could still be starring on Heroes.

Brooke Mueller: Reportedly in Rehab


Earlier this week, multiple sources reported that Brooke Mueller was ordered by doctors to rest and relax in order to fight off a recent infection.

We wonder if they have masseuses and spa treatments in rehab.

According to Entertainment Tonight, that’s where Charlie Sheen’s troubled wife is headed, as insiders say she has entered a drug and alcohol center in North Carolina.

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Mueller was arrested on a DUI charge in 1996 and for cocaine possession in 2001. She was released from the hospital on Monday, where she was being treated for pneumonia.

Legally, Brooke is still barred from communicating with Sheen. A judge will rule on a protective order against the actor next month. Until then, it sounds like Mueller is doing her best to clean up her act and become the best mother she can be to young twins Sam and Max.

We wish her the best of luck with that goal.

** UPDATE: Mueller’s attorney, Yale Galanter, says his client is NOT in rehab. He says she’s at a facility that helps patients recover from serious illnesses, such as pneumonia.

Ke$ha Speaks on Unique Name, Song Writing and More


Take one part Lady GaGa, mix it with a dash of Madonna and toss in some Pink. The result? Burgeoning music superstar Ke$ha.

In an interview with Rolling Stone, the singer explains the origin of her name’s spelling, while planning for a huge 2010…

On the year ahead: Let’s just pretend the world ends in 2012, I want people to live as if it’s 2011 in December. I try not to think too far ahead, because I also feel like I’m trying to do as much as I can to set myself up properly. I put on the best live show, the absolute best live show I can possibly can.

Kesha Serbert

On the irony of the dollar sign in her name: It’s so weird, I hate champagne, so there’s a song called “Party at a Rich Dude’s House” where I went and peed in the champagne bottles and thought it was hilarious. Just kind of being an asshole, really, is what that song’s about.

On the name of her album: Animal, the name of the record, it’s kind of my steez, I have to say. I named it that because I want people to lose it when they listen to my record and go to the animal part of themselves that they suppress. Society has taught us to suppress certain things and not do certain things.

Ke$ha PictureRolling Stone Pic

Susan bumps into a burglar

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British singing sensation Susan Boyle had the surprise of her life upon returning home from recording her vocals for Simon Cowell‘s charity single last night. According to police reports, Susan discovered a young man fleeing her home in West Lothian, Scotland, and called the police. “Susan is unharmed but is obviously very, very shocked. The guy had seen her come in and bolted out straight past Susan,” a friend told The Scottish Sun newspaper. Inside the home, her personal property had been disturbed, but it didn’t appear that anything had been stolen. A 16-year-old was arrested later that evening and released without being charged.

John Edwards Made Sex Tape with Rielle Hunter, Wanted “Crazy Slut” to Get an Abortion


Disgraced politician John Edwards nailed mistress Rielle Hunter in his wife’s bed, made a sex tape with her, wanted her to have an abortion and called her a “crazy slut” among other choice terms, a new book by his former aide claims.

At this point, do you doubt any of that?

In The Politician, Andrew Young, who once claimed Edwards’ love child was his own to protect his boss, portrays John as more of a disgrace than we thought.

We didn’t think much of him, either.

A self-obsessed, all-around creep, the ex-senator stopped at nothing to hide his indiscretions, including urging “crazy slut” Rielle Hunter to abort their child.

Low Life

In 2006, Hunter began having sex with the man she called “Love Lips” and became increasingly demanding as she went into hiding to bear Edwards’ child.

Young describes Edwards as “barely under control” when Hunter’s pregnancy first came to light, with John questioning who could have fathered the baby.

He tried to talk her into abortion, but she wanted the baby, “which she believed to be the reincarnated spirit of a Buddhist monk who would save the world.”

You cannot make this $h!t up.

When the National Enquirer first broke the story, Andrew Young writes, Edwards pleaded with him to claim he fathered the child and take off with Hunter.

Hunter initially resisted, but soon signed on to the plan in which she would vanish into a life of luxury (very possibly paid for with John’s campaign funds).

Edwards met up with Rielle Hunter and the baby, but still asked Young to swipe a diaper and discussed having a fake DNA test “prove” he wasn’t the dad.

By mid-2007, Young clashed with his boss about exiting the bizarre scene, then found a John Edwards sex tape left behind in Hunter’s California hideout.

Young popped in the tape and was treated to footage of a pregnant lady believed to be Hunter “right in the middle of a sexual encounter” with Edwards.

Edwards, who initially denied all of this, went into free fall when the Enquirer ran pictures of him visiting Hunter and their child at a Beverly Hills hotel.

A tearful Edwards called his longtime aide, reporting: “They caught me. It’s all over.” The moron admitted the affair, but denied the love child was his.

He admitted paternity only last week.

Rielle Hunter, Frances Quinn Hunter

Rielle Hunter with John Edwards’ daughter, Frances Quinn.

Even as he cheated on his wife Elizabeth, Edwards refused to consider a divorce – partly because he still loved his wife, and partly because voters did.

Six of one, half a dozen of the other.

Young says he went along with the paternity scheme out of a cultish loyalty to the candidate – and because he believed Edwards would save his career.

But, in short, he writes, “I was f—ed.”

Brooke’s out of the hospital

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Charlie Sheen‘s wife Brooke Mueller is finally resting at a friend’s home after spending almost a week in a LA hospital due to complications from tooth surgery and a bout of pneumonia. According to her mother, Moira Fiore: “I picked her up and brought her to a friend’s house in Los Angeles, where we will stay until we decide what we are going to do and where we will go.” The restraining order a judge issued against Charlie as the result of his December 25 fight in Aspen, Colo., with Brooke, where he reportedly pulled a knife on her, was temporarily lifted while she was hospitalized, but is now back in place. The couple will be in court to review the protection order on February 8.

Chace Crawford’s hot date

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Gossip Girl’s Chace Crawford has a new woman in his life — model Jennifer Akerman. Chace and Jennifer, who is the sister of Couples Retreat star Malin Akerman, were seen getting cozy at a Hollywood house party on January 15. “They’ve known each other for a while, but now it looks like they’re dating,” a friend reveals. While it’s not serious yet, the pair is enjoying each other’s company. “Jennifer is adorable and exactly his type,” says the friend. He has been happily living the single life since breaking up with country singer Carrie Underwood via a text message in 2008. “I’m 24 in New York City, so I’m not exactly coming home every night plucking the violin strings,” Chace recently said. After attending a Golden Globes celebration, Chace moved on to the house party where he focused his attention on Jennifer, a sexy blond model.